I Still Have Issues With Halloween Kills

When I saw Halloween Kills in the theatres last year, I had multiple issues with it – the whole “mob mentality” aspect, the plethora of “stupid people doing stupid things” moments, the repetitive story structure, and so on. But it did have some things I liked, including the 1978  flashback sequence, the visuals of Michael Myers emerging from the burning Strode compound, and the fight/chase scene with Lindsay (Kyle Richards). And because of that, and because I’m just an all-around Halloween fan, I picked up a copy of Halloween Kills when it came out on Blu-ray.

And now having re-watched it, the initial issues I had with it are all still valid, but there’s one that trumps them all. It started as this nagging feeling that something just wasn’t “right”…and then I  was listening to a YouTube review that triggered a light bulb moment for me, and it all came clear.

It has to do with the ill-advised retcon the filmmakers made with its predecessor Halloween (2018), where, instead of escaping into the night at the end of Halloween (1978) and continuing to terrorize the town of Haddonfield for years to come, they had Michael get caught and thrown into jail for the next 40 years, effectively erasing everything that happened in every film that followed in the franchise. Now, this isn’t the first time we’ve seen retcons in the Halloween series, but this is by far the most sweeping.

And here’s my problem with that. If you’re going to retcon Michael Myers into a one-and-done spree killer with a victim total you can count on one hand, then you cannot have everyone in Haddonfield still regard him as if he’s this relentless, soulless maniac in a white mask that has terrorized their town repeatedly over the years, racking up kills well into the double-digits.

And yet that’s exactly what Halloween Kills does.

The townspeople of Haddonfield in Halloween Kills consider Michael Myers to be the embodiment of evil, this force that has held the town in the grip of fear for decades. When they learn he has escaped and is back in Haddonfield they whip themselves into a frenzy as they rally to hunt and destroy him. It’s something befitting of an impending confrontation with the boogeyman that has haunted their nightmares all these years.

Except, no.

Because of the retcon, this Michael Myers is, on the surface, just a disturbed man who, one Halloween night, killed three unfortunate teenagers, attacked and injured a fourth, and then was quickly caught and imprisoned. End of story.

And that is not someone whose very existence holds a town in fear for decades. That is not someone who drives the woman who survived his attack to go the full survivalist/weapons expert/fortified compound route because she feels that when (not if) he escapes he will be coming for HER so she has to BE PREPARED because he is nigh UNSTOPPABLE.

He’s not that guy anymore, that  Michael Myers never existed. So, treating him like he is, is just ridiculous.

Although, I guess NOW (post-Halloween Kills) he is that guy…because retconned Michael may have only killed three teens back in ’78,  but he sure made up for lost time by doing in around 30+ in 2018. So, hmm…

STILL, I stand by my rant. Retconning Michael Myers, but not the townspeople’s perception of him is just lazy writing and severely affects the credibility of the story and its characters. There. I’m done.

Well, at least now, in the upcoming Halloween Ends, there will be some justification for treating him as the devil-eyed, evil-on-two-legs, all-father of death.

Halloween Treats

Looking to get some last-minute scares on as we head into the Hallo-weekend? Good thing there’s still a plethora of cinematic, streaming, and televised spookiness to be had! Here’s a quick rundown of some of horror’s recent offerings that may be just the right fright fix you’re looking for.

Halloween Kills (Theatres/Peacock)

Of course, I have to lead with the obvious. And it doesn’t get more obvious than a Halloween film released around Halloween. Halloween Kills is a very divisive movie, because what it does well, it does REALLY well (A flashback to what happened after Dr. Loomis shot Michael Myers in the original Halloween, Michael being as frightfully menacing as ever, a great sequence with RHOBH star Kyle Richards reprising her role of Lindsay Wallace).

But when Halloween Kills trips up, it not only stumbles, it falls, twists an ankle, and has difficulty getting back up again (Jamie Lee Curtis’ Laurie Strode is sidelined for most of the film as a patient at Haddonfield Memorial (AGAIN), Michael’s tendencies go from violent to ultra-uber-violent, the film’s split focus makes it play out like a series of disconnected scenes rather than a cohesive whole).

And that it’s also the middle film of an announced trilogy is very evident. This isn’t another chapter of the Halloween saga (which in this case only includes Halloween (1978) and Halloween (2018) and disregards everything that came in between), it’s necessary filler needed to get us from Halloween (2018) to the upcoming Halloween Ends.

But like I’ve implied, it’s not all that bad. Sure, it`s disappointing to a Halloween fan like myself, but there’s still enjoyment to be had, chills to be felt, and shocks to be shocked…just not on a consistent basis.

(Fun tip: you can also take this as an alternate version of Halloween II (1981) as it answers the question, what would’ve happened if Michael didn’t follow Laurie to Haddonfield Memorial and just continued killing people in town instead?)

And now for some quick takes:

There’s Someone Inside Your House (Netflix)

Borrowing heavily from Scream and other of-the-era slashers (most notably I Know What You Did Last Summer and Cherry Falls), Someone still manages to inject some originality into its tale of a masked killer terrorizing the students of a small-town high school. The twist is his mask is always a 3D-printed mask of the face of his next intended victim, and he tops off their death by revealing a dark, hidden secret of theirs to the public. Some genuine suspenseful moments can be found here along with some great set pieces. (What can I say? I’m a sucker for a corn maze).

Slasher: Flesh and Blood (Shudder/Hollywood Suite)

This Canadian horror anthology series, previously seen on Chiller and Netflix, recently returned for its fourth season as a Shudder series (although not on Shudder Canada, which seems…odd).

This time around we get a dysfunctional family reunion on a secluded coastal island, where a competition to see who will be named the sole heir of their patriarch’s estate proves to have some very deadly (not to mention gruesome) consequences for its contestants, as they’re targeted and taken down one-by-one by a methodical, masked maniac.

I Know What You Did Last Summer (Amazon Prime)

Speaking of I Know What You Did Last Summer…this tv version isn’t so much of remake as it is a retelling. And it brings enough changes from the original flick (which itself was a loose adaptation of the novel of the same name by Lois Duncan) to intrigue fans.

The plot is still the same, a group of teens celebrating their graduation accidentally hit and kill someone with their car and end up hiding the body and not reporting it. One year later they start getting stalked by someone whose calling card is the message “I know what you did last summer”. But this time around we have a new location (Hawaii instead of North Carolina), a new set of teens (five versus four, of which only two are a couple), and in a rather unique twist, the lead character (portrayed by Jennifer Love Hewitt in the ‘97 original and its ’98  follow-up I Still Know What You Did Last Summer) is now “lead characters”. As in she’s now twins. And if you think that’s going to lead to some twists in the story, I’d have to say that I think you’re right.

Chucky (SyFy/USA)

You can’t keep a good doll down, not even if you’ve rebooted him. Chucky, that murderous doll from the Child’s Play franchise has made the leap to television, but even though the franchise was rebooted (and quite well, I might add) with 2019’s Child’s Play. The TV series Chucky  is a follow-up to the last pre-reboot film in the franchise (2017’s Cult of Chucky). Which kinda makes sense. I mean, what franchise wouldn’t want to emulate the success Halloween has had from playing mix-and-match with its installments for decades now? Just so long as we don’t get a “Rob Zombie’s Child’s Play”, I think we’ll be good.

Happy Halloween!